Times of India.com just released a piece about five things to look out for during Bollywood power couple Ranbir Kapoor and Katrina Kaif's wedding. But we think a few things were left off the list, so here is our take on what will happen during their weding day. Unlike the tabloids, we will be digging for the truth and not just settle for rehashing insults about Ranbir's failed movie career.
Before the evening's over, a Khan will do something inappropriate
Even in India, everyone in high society is related to everyone else. The Khans and the Kapoors are no exception. Salman and Ranbir actually dated the same woman twice, Deepika Padukone and Katrina Kaif. In a twist that would make even a militant hillbilly from Kentucky jealous, Katrina's ex, Salman will, more than likely, be attending the wedding. Katrina will thus become related to her ex through marriage.
Khans acting inappropriately is kind of like the sun is bright. It's so blatantly obvious that it really goes without saying. Be it Salman, or even Kareena, who is only a Khan by marriage, it doesn't matter. When festivities are at hand, a Khan has to get his Khan on and deliver the Khan as hard and unrelenting as he/she possibly can.
Everyone's Seen Everyone Naked, Right?
It's alright to be friendly. Joy is what makes the world go round. Friends are important, especially on a special day like a wedding. Unfortunately, Deepika looking at Ranbir while he's getting married may be a bit concerning for the new bride. Welcome to Bollywood, where everyone has seen everyone else naked at some point.
Don't Mess With Mama Kapoor
Katrina Kaif was smart. She got on Mama Kapoor's good side. Now, Mama Kapoor likes Katrina and if something happens, where Katrina and Ranbir do not work out, Mama's going to get her butt-kicking shoes on, and she'll be coming for you, Ranbir.
Mama eighty-sixed Deepika, or so rumors say.
How Many Khans Will Be Arrested?
The over/under stands somewhere around 6. It's still early, so get your bets in before all the good numbers are gone.
Not Everyone is Making the Cut
Bombay Velvet director Anurag Kashyup was strangely left off the guest list, however, Ranbir says it was just an oversight.
We wish the Lovebirds well. If these two lunatics can find love, there is hope for us all. Just make sure Deepika is secured firmly in the closet until the ceremony is safely completed.
